Va-gay-tion Part II

Where did we leave off last? Ah yeah...the tic tac story. Well with only 2 days left of vacation we decided that we'd return to Rehoboth on Sunday. But first J and I wanted to go river kayaking. J's parents had just purchased two new kayaks and we were eager to try them out on the river behind the house. We walked through the woods and down the path to the 2 'Manatee' kayaks and carried them down to the water.

Unfortunately the tide was extremely low and some Delaware regulation prohibited the construction of any permanent docks so in order to get the kayaks out to the river we had to push them across several feet of mud. It was tough but we got them out to water. The river was slow moving and peaceful. As we paddled upstream we saw several turtles jumping into the water. We also saw plenty of small fish and a large egret (I think) that kept flying down river. We must have chased it off inadvertently 5 or 6 times.

Kayaking was really relaxing. The craft move through the water so effortlessly, but somehow I managed to develop two nice calluses between my thumbs and index fingers from gripping the paddle.

We went several miles upstream before deciding to turn back. Upon arriving back at the dock we found the tide had lowered significantly. Now to get the kayaks back on land we had to hop out onto the mud. J stepped out with one leg which immediately sank calf-deep. With one leg in and one out of the kayak he slowly inched the craft to the shore.

I was a bit lazier and just hopped out with both legs. I immediately sank up to my waist in this thick mud. It was almost like quicksand. I struggled to slog through the mud while dragging the kayak behind me. It took a few minutes and when it was all over I was saturated in mud. Damn that was messy.

Later that day we got back in the car and headed to Rehoboth for the 2nd time. The weather was nicer this time and the place was a lot more crowded. Everyone determined that my SPF 50 sunblock was too excessive and would prevent them from getting tan so we stopped in a convenience store to buy some sunblock. J and A, both of which are avid gym buffs, had their shirts off.

For those of you who don't know, Rehoboth is known as a 'gay beach' meaning there are lots of businesses owned by gay/lesbian people or businesses that are gay/lesbian friendly. So as we entered the convenience store J and A found some SPF 8 which would prevent them from getting burned but let them pick up some color. As they stood in line another customer was on his cell phone. It appeared he was doing some text messaging but upon closer inspection the back of his cell phone had a huge camera lens on it. As I walked past I noticed his phone's display. He was videotaping.

I watched him pan back and forth over the shirtless torsos of A and J before his friend (maybe boyfriend) said something like 'Come on, stop filming them.' I told A and J what I just witnessed and they were flabbergasted. J was especially pissed.

They had both been oggled like pieces of steak and now there was a good chance they'd appear on the next 'Guys Gone Wild' video. I cracked up. I searched youtube to see if I could find the footage online, but I didn't succeed. I did find this video though, which was taken in 2007 at the same beach. WARNING: Contains muscular, swim-trunk clad men. Look for A and J in 2008's edition.

After being visually violated at the convenience store we headed to the beach which was packed. We managed to carve out a small square and then surveyed our surroundings. This was definitely no Dewey Beach - tons and tons of families, little kids, older people. There wasn't really any room to run around or throw a football so after awhile everyone wanted to walk around. I volunteered to stay and guard our stuff so A, K, and J got up to 'check things out'.

Upon their return they told me how they found a group of attractive young ladies who were running from seagulls. They laughed at the girls for being so skittish when the hand of karma smacked them. As J walked by a seagull pooped right on his face. The fateful shot hit him right above the eye and worst yet everyone in the vicinity saw it and started laughing. The only consolation was that multiple people told J that getting shit on by a bird is good luck.

Sure it is.

We returned to our tiny plot of sand when two younger girls returned to their towels. They couldn't have been more than 14 or 15 because I overheard one on the cellphone asking her dad for a ride. I then zoned out but according to everyone else these teens then talked about how they got drunk and hooked up with random people.

Geez, what's with these kids today? When I was 15 I didn't do anything. I never 'got drunk' or 'hooked up'. Damn whippersnappers!

We had dinner that night at a place a bartender suggested. It was called Zogg's. Everyone seemed to love it but my food wasn't so great. My advice - don't order food at a place that has 'bar' in the name. I got some clam/mussel penne pasta which was pretty disgusting. I regretted it later that night.

The rest of the trip was pretty uneventful. On Monday we took J's parents out to lunch to thank them for letting us crash in their basement. I probably had the best meal of the week at this place calld Smith and Co. I ordered a lamb burger and it was pretty damn tasty. In fact, I was almost done before I noticed a small black beetle crawling across my plate. I assume it came out of my burger, maybe hitch-hiked on a piece of lettuce.

The beetle made it about 2 inches before it collapsed and died, a victim of the suffocating olive oil. I informted the waiter and he comped the burger and gave us a free dessert. It was a good dessert.

Then we were off...several wrong turns later (GPS isn't as useful as you'd think) we made it back home where my parents had a BBQ going for us.

Not a bad trip, not the best, but definitely some memorable tales.